Answered Phone Call

I have to share with you my friend’s story......

(for privacy purposes, I’m using fictitious names - thanks for understanding)  

On Sunday my friend, Kelly was in her husband’s office at the church that he pastors.  She stopped in briefly to talk with him and the phone rang.  Understand, it was Sunday morning, offices were closed and she typically doesn’t answer the phone at the church office, but she did.  There was a female voice on the other end asking if there was any way she could get picked up to attend their church service that morning.  Kelly asked a few questions, what’s your name? where are you?  The caller answered, “My name is Heather, I’m at a woman’s shelter a few miles away, I just got out of the hospital last night, I’m here because of a domestic abuse situation and I’d really like to attend your church.  If it’s not too much to ask I really would like a ride.”  Kelly talked with her a little longer and got off the phone.  Heather told her that she would be waiting on the corner outside for her to pick her up.  

This was an odd phone call.  When Kelly answered the phone she assumed that someone was calling who needed to know the times of the services or maybe someone needed directions - who would’ve thought there would be a call this early in the morning from a random person with such a need? AND What were the chances that Kelly just happened to be in the church office to pick up the phone?  THIS was a GOD thing!  How cool was that!  

Ok, so Kelly made a phone call to the woman’s shelter to ensure that the call was legit, did some due diligence and off she went to pick up Heather; she took along a guy from the church to ride in the car with her for safety reasons.

During the drive to church Kelly and Heather got to know each other.  Heather shared with her the situation she was in and how she had broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder and had been beaten by her boyfriend.  She explained that she almost died and could not go back to the home where she was living and that she needed to get far away from there so her boyfriend would not find her.  She had NOTHING just the clothes on her back and a small suitcase.  She was in a lot of pain.  Defeated. No money.  No strength.

With the help of Kelly’s church they were able to help Heather purchase a bus ticket to make the journey to another women’s shelter that would get her closer to her family.  She was very grateful for the help.

One question that Kelly asked Heather was, “What prompted you to call our church? Did you find us in the yellow pages? or what?”  Heather responded, “While I was in the hospital last night, the nurse that cared for me suggested that I call your church, she gave me your phone number and said that your church would be compassionate and loving. So I called.  That’s how I found you.”

As Kelly and Heather’s encounter was coming to an end, Heather was dropped off at the shelter to get a taxi to take her to the bus station. Kelly asked her one last question.  She said, “Heather, do you have a relationship with God?  What keeps you going.”  To Kelly’s surprise she responded, “My father is a baptist minister.  Several years ago he told me that I could NOT be a part of HIS family UNLESS I got my tattoo removed, I stopped smoking, and I stopped living my life the way I had been living it.  He has put conditions upon me to be accepted.  I’ve done so many terrible things that God could NEVER forgive me.  I am unlovable - God would not want me.”

Through both of their tears Kelly shared with Heather that she IS worthy of God’s unconditional love no matter what she had done in the past and that what she was believing were lies.  God loves you - JUST AS YOU ARE - He created you, chose YOU! Kelly was able to give her some materials to read to help her understand God’s love and forgiveness and then Heather was gone.

I was touched by this story and I have to tell you why;  this is SO Keeping it Personal - I LOVE IT!!  You see it’s the little things that we do that make the most impact AND it’s those very simple things that we do or say that we may NEVER know the impact it has on another life.

The nurse who referred Heather to Kelly’s church DID NOT let the lingering thought pass through her mind - she took ACTION!  She shared with Heather, she encouraged her, THAT IS Keeping it Personal.

Kelly, picked up the phone, LISTENED, asked questions, gathered information, DID NOT pass judgement and that impacted Heather’s life.

The nurse AND Kelly may never know how what they did or what they said impacted Heather’s life, but they took action and it is so GREAT!!  Priceless.

I am inspired by this story.  I was grateful that Kelly shared it with me.  I hope that it inspires you to take action on those little thoughts no matter what the outcome might be.

It Takes A Village

I am a pediatric nurse who specializes in evaluating and treating children who have been suspected of being physically or sexually abused. I've been a nurse for the last 16 years, and at my current job for just under 11. Some say to me 'working with abused children must be so hard'. Yes, I suppose it is, but I also have to admit that I've learned to keep a safe distance to be able to go home and sleep at night. When I say distance, I mean my heart.

This time of year, I feel more disturbed than I usually do. Disturbed at the hurt placed upon our most vulnerable children. Hurt from a slap, hit, shake, kick, slam. Hurt from being touched sexually. Hurt from being stuck in the middle of 2 grown ups (their parents) who should know better. Hurt from a parent who doesn't believe their child. Hurt from insufficient housing, or no housing. Hurt from lack of education. Hurt from an angry parent. Hurt from dishonesty. Hurt from hunger. Hurt from disease. Hurt from an unwanted pregnancy. An unwanted child.

I think I feel sad at this time of year the most, simply because I, by contrast, am surrounded by joy. Quite honestly, I feel like many of these children don't stand a chance. Why? Because of their environment. Because of those who were given the privilege of being their parent. Because of their failures. It is a cycle. A tough one to break too. How do you expect a child raised in an unhealthy environment to be any different than all they've known?

It is easy to get into the 'whoa is me' mode. Or the, 'nothing will make a difference' mode. What I have chosen to do- or the approach I have chosen to take- is to do what I can. When I have a chance to interact with families, I try and be a positive influence. When I have an appointment with a child who is living in less than ideal circumstances, I try and provide as much love and encouragement as possible, knowing that the hug I give them may be the only hug they've had in awhile. I choose to pray for them silently. This, however is my job. This, is what I am paid to do. This, is how I help my family pay my bills.

I was thinking about what the average person can do to help children in our community. What I can do, when I'm not at work. It doesn't necessarily have to be with abused children. But remember that age old saying, "It takes a village?" I believe it does. This site is about keeping things personal. Not going about our daily lives, isolated from our neighbors, but getting involved. I want to be that parent, that adult who kids feel safe coming to. The house kids want to hang out at. I think it goes without saying that we all can be positive role models for our children, for our neighbor's children. But, it does take some effort.

I happen to live in an amazing neighborhood where there are children exploding at the seams. We all seem to pitch in and help each other out. Play dates are a common occurrence, and children feel free to wander in and out of their friends' homes, most likely with not a care in the world. What if, though, you had the opportunity to be a positive influence in a child's life. What if a child walked through your doors with a heavy heart. Would you take the time to recognize it? In my job, it is easy. I know up front that I will be working with someone who needs help in one way or another. At home, it may not be so obvious. I may not take the time to recognize how I can affect a child's life. Would you?

I encourage you to open your doors to our children, and be a positive influence in their lives. Did you know that having a positive adult figure in a child's life is a huge protective factor for them? You may be helping in ways you don't even know about. Take time to listen, to be around, to be present, to care. Your actions and words, what you do and don't do, in front of a child may be just what they need.